Well... Negative...

They said they would call if they wanted me, but it's already a few days late, so I guess I just didn't make the cut. And I'm just gonna be stuck here until something comes along.

This is one of the weirdest things in life. I have never felt as such for a long time now. It's not like I didn't do well at the interviews... Heck, the first Agency that I went to even told me that he was very happy with me. But why no calls?? They were supposed to call on Friday, if not then yesterday... But until now... still zilch...

Maybe they're just late, maybe it's that my remuneration requirements are too high, maybe this, maybe that...

Sigh... I seriously wonder why...

Well, in hindsight, maybe it's for the best. God knows that I need to year-end bonus, and I hope that it's gonna be a sizeable amount.

But then, looking back at the 56K mistake, hopes aren't high.

Maybe God is trying to teach me something. Life as a Christian is one of total abandonment. To totally put your life under God's mercy and grace, which in faith, should be sufficient for me. Just that I am born as a worrier. Not a warrior, but a worrier...

It's difficult to not think about my own future and just leave everything to God. I need to make plans, and I have aspirations to see my plans being put into action. I have my own desires, my own dreams, but these should be God's desires and dreams for my life. I know it's the bigger plan, and bigger picture, but that doesn't stop me from worrying about tomorrow... sigh...

Pressure from all over, family, friends, acquaintences, work, church... the whole package...

Where do I go from here?