A change...

Well, I've been in the dumps long enough... So, here's a post to cheer you guys up...

So, as any self respecting individual would do, we would go through the shitty education system of our shitty country, which produces straight A students like nothing. Then we would enrol ourselves into some shitty college with even shittier lecturers and pay a small fortune to get a piece of paper that says you've passed all your required subjects to qualify you for a degree in some shitty programme that you hope will get you a salary that earns you more than a shitty car to boast about. Then after all that, you find yourself signing on the dotted line and accept an offer for a shitty job that overworks and underpays you.

So, my question this good morning is, what do you bring to your office on your first day at work?

Here's a list of things that would be on my list.

1. Bring a pen. I might to write stuff straight away and I can't be seen borrowing something as elementary as a pen...
2. My own personal cup, hidden in a rather big bag so that I won't look 'too' kampung. Ditch the spoon... it makes a lot of noise in the cup during your travelling
3. A small inconspicuous bottle of water just in case the kiam siap company don't have water dispenser wann...
4. An extra shirt, just in case you know...
5. An umbrella so that if it rains, you'll still be able to remain relatively dry
6. A swiss army knife. You can't ever go wrong with one... Can be used to intimidate ugly looking colleagues and it shows that you 'man' enough to bring a knife around.. (Phallic symbol.. ahahahahah)
7. Some sweets. It's a good ice-breaker to get yourself acquainted with the fella sitting next to you, for all you know, you might need to bear with one another for the rest of your 20 years in the company... So start well...
8. And a little something to represent who you are: I suggest a soft-toy Monkey that can hold a placard that says "Pay Peanuts, Get Monkey".

If you observed all the above, you'll find yourself bringing one of those white, blue and red bags that you see in Hongkie Soapies. 'Biau Gerrrr, Wo Lai Yehhhh!!!'

So what's your list of things to bring to your office?