Mental Crap

I have not been able to crap anything good recently and it's been like this for quite some time.

Maybe it's like this because of the separation of the State and Religion in my blog. When I first started blogging, I used to write about almost anything with regards to religion, my life and other random stuff. But now, since I have set-up my secondary blog to cater to some religious readers and to cater to the non-religious readers here, it seems that my mind hasn't been able to crap good quality stuff since the separation.

And then, I've been so busy nowadays that I have not really got the time to sit down and think about stuff.

Worries of the mind wearies the body.

So much to do, so little time to do it. So much is happening this year for me, and most of the time, I am not in control of the situations. Maybe i'll just let loose and say 'Come what may'... Maybe that's what I should do.

It seems that my previous posts have been repeating these same things... Not enough time to do that stuff that I am supposed to do, but still there's a lot of things that only I am able do...

sigh...

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I've been trying to take control of my life ever since I got independent.

My upbringing was rather 'quick', and I thank my parents for that. I was protected from society in a sense, but I was also taught to think for myself since a very young age. Maybe it's in me or maybe it's from external influences, but I have always been curious of human behaviour and politics since a very very young age.

And by the time I rebelled against my parents, they knew that I have grown up and I can take care of myself relatively well. To my surprise, when I asked them during a family get-together, they have actually treated me as my own individual since I was 15 years old. Of course they have guided me still until I came over to the City for my tertiary education, I have been given the freedom of opinion.

My parents have been able to identify that and once I step into college, I am on my own. And thank God that their actions show that they have totally let me loose. That they trusted in my ability to think for myself. Fully.

Most parents can't do this to their children, and as result, they actually block their children from maturing into a full-fledged adult. If you're way past your 'kid' age, but yet you're still handled with 'kid' gloves, then you will never grow up.

Of course, sometimes, it's because the 'kid' has yet to grow up mentally, but one has to learn how to let go eventually. However, many parents fail to see that. That's why you will still see some classmates being ushered to and from college by their mothers. This is of course one of the most pathetic sights you should have to endure in your entire life.

As a child of your parents, it shows two things. One: Your parents do not trust in your ability to think as a matured individual or Two: Your parents worry about you to such an extreme extent that it borders the point of obssession.

Both very VERY sad cases.

However, as your parent's child, you are also responsible to win over your parents' trust. Act like an adult when you're supposed to, and build trust in your father/mother-daughter/son relationship. Sometimes even to the point of acting out of your own will just to gain their trust and approval. For the true mark of maturity is not only about making decisions and being responsible for the outcome, it is also about being able to do the things that you should do.

The greatest lesson my mom taught me EVER is that a person should be doing what he/she at a particular age should do. No more, no less. If you do not do it, you will regret it for life. Which is true to a point that we only live once, and we will only experience today once. So, do what you are supposed to do at your age and you will have no regrets. If you do something too soon, you'll regret that you've done it and you can't go back to undo it with a greater maturity. If you don't do something, then you will find that you are past the age of doing it.

In the end, we must acknowledge that although we are individuals, we still have to live by society's standards because we belong to the society and we are part of it. Unless of course, you choose to live in a mountain cave eating bat droppings and drinking rain water... In the very end, it is up to society to define what is permissable, and what is scorned upon.

It's always a tug-of-war, and it takes two to tango. So, once you've reached a compromise and a mid-point, you have to work at keeping the balance.