The price of leadership...

A few comments made in my previous post has triggered this thought.

Being a leader in a small local church, I am required to do quite a lot of things. Not that I want to brag about my abilities, but all these responsibilities are circumstantial.

Well, here's a list of what my priorities are.

1. Cell group leading ~ Now, because we have just multiplied, I would need to run a 1 man operation for at least another month. But care needs to be given, relationships need to be built. A true leader is the most willing servant.
2. Worship Team ~ I play the guitar, and I sing, and I can do PA as well. Now, the team has added worship leading into the list.
3. Nurture classes ~ Because I am one of the more senior guys in a college-ministry-focused church, I need to nurture a few new believers in the ways of the Christian faith.
4. Saturday night driver ~ There's a group of students in Bukit Jalil that needs transport to come to church, and because I have a clean driver's record, I am one of the few people who can drive the church transport to fetch them from Bukit Jalil. Although I enjoy it very much, but that leaves me with very little time for my weekends. and now, because another driver is going back hometown for a short period of 4 weeks, I will now have to drive the van to fetch children to church on Sunday afternoons as well.
5. Personal relationships ~ I need time to nurture relationships with my girlfriend, and some other friends. That's why, weekend sports activities are important. Friday nights, basketball. Sunday evening, Football. We are trying to re-start badminton as well. All this is also important for my health. Chances are, if anything will kill me, it's heart disease.
6. I need to go to both English services ~ (saturday night and sunday morning) because most of my cell members are in Saturday night (more youthful and vibrant) and I am leading worship on Sunday mornings.
7. Occasional meetings ~ being a leader, there will of course be meetings here and there.

Well, that's basically how I live my life every weekend. So it's work to earn a living during the week, and work so that others may 'live' during weekends. Sometimes, I do wonder, why can't a church of 300 find someone else to do such things?

I am so loaded with responsibility that sometimes, I forget to acknowledge God, come back to Him and be still.

Maybe I need to share more of this in Cell, and throw down the gauntlet of showing myself as strong even when I am weak. Maybe I need to learn how to say 'No' to certain requests, but then I also know that the guys up in the church adminstration will only come to me when they're really desparate because they know of the burden on my shoulders...

so... it's indeed very difficult to say 'No' sometimes because most of the time, I am the only one who's able to do it.

Sometimes, I do pity my cell members because I have so much to do, sometimes they get neglected. My pretty girlfriend as well, sometimes, she will suffer from a lack of attention because i simply have not got the time to give her the attention. and I do thank God for her because she is the one who encourages me through thick and thin. She will be there for me whenever she can, sitting beside me on my driving excursions, helping me do stuff that i do not have time for, and other stuff.

As for my cell members, they will need to learn to be independent. I can only do so much, but God can do so much more. So sometimes, all I can do is to let God deal with them.